Cat Related Expressions

Isn’t it odd how humans use a lot of Cat related expressions to describe how they feel and their surroundings. There is the extremely distasteful expression that the area, room etc., is “not big enough to swing a Cat around in!” As if anyone would want to swing a Cat?

Mind you having said that there have been quite a few really awful people exposed this year by my good self and other areas of the media – the dreadful cow who dropped a Cat in a wheelie bin comes to mind and that terribly ugly woman who drowned some poor defenceless Kittens. I just hope that these people were the few and that their actions are the actions a very small minority of humans and that they have a really awful Christmas and the worst New Year don’t you?

You have to hope that they suffer in other ways because the punishment that these dreadful women have received has been balloon-like in it light handedness.

The Cat related expression which triggered this little ‘blogette’ (another made up word of mine meaning ‘small blog’) was “has the Cat got your tongue?”

It’s such a dreadful expression isn’t it when you think about it, and I know that because I have thought about it a lot recently and before that when I was writing my bestselling masterpiece of feline literature “Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary” which I feel duty bound to say is available here Amazon.com well one has to pay for the lifestyle one has become accustomed too and of course keep one’s book at the very top of the bestsellers list doesn’t one? Well this one does!

So back to the expression “has the Cat got your tongue?” What was the person thinking when they asked that question originally and almost as importantly who asked the question in the first place? Who knows the person who first said has the cat etc., is long gone and forgotten happily or he would be Dogged by Cats if you see what I mean!

But what does it mean when someone asks “has the Cat got your tongue?” Well they just they want to know why you are not speaking when they think you should! Isn’t nosiness annoying? It’s not only nosey but it spawns dreadful expressions too!

So here to prove that Cats don’t need your tongue because they almost always have a more than satisfactory and generally superior one themselves thank you is a picture of my friend Burt the Black and White Cat taking a moment to enjoy his tongue – ‘nicely!’

Burt the Black and White cat.jpg

I hope you appreciate and like Burt’s whiskers too – he does!

About the Author

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Cat kind, his sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet such as www.pawsperouspets.com.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or at Amazon.com or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

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Here Are Some More Signs For Christmas

There are some wonderful scenic areas in Tyne and Wear in the north east of the UK – I promise! That means that there is no reason at all for the Leisure Services Division of Chester-le-Street council to use hype or other forms of unnecessary marketing devices to get people to look at their surroundings but they obviously do! Or is that shamelessly they do!

The sign says it all - the breakdown in English manners education ...jpg

I personally can’t say I like this next sign; but I do wholeheartedly agree with its intentions which I think are designed to stop this sort of ‘behaviour’ because this sort of ‘behaviour’ is extremely unsavoury and of course it almost goes without saying is a national past time for men in the Czech republic and it should be stopped. I believe that because like most Cats I tend not to want to behave like this in public, we are very private waste product providers – it is a little like our charity work ‘anonymous.’

Peeing in Public.jpg

Mind you probably the worst thing about this sign (sent to me by a ‘friend’ in Namibia, a country that if my geography etc., serves me correctly has a majority of Black residents/nationals), is that the person… err ‘performing’ is clearly a white man (might be Elvis in a boiler suit was my first thought).

Why, may I ask, when logic dictates that the people perpetrating this frowned upon or possibly illegal behaviour which obviously carries such a stringent penalty as detailed on the sign, is the guy having a pee white?

I am pretty sure that this sign would be considered racist in the Western World – but then what do I know I am only a humble Cat! Ok I don’t believe the ‘humble’ nonsense either har ha!

Ashamed.jpg

This wonderful sign, made to the usual high and exacting standards of manufacture that the country is renowned for was sent to me by ‘ashamed’ of China – I supposed it touched him!

PLEASE READ WITH A JAPANESE ACCENT “Lough wha the sign writer done now!”

Rocker room.jpg

PLEASE READ WITH A JAPANESE ACCENT “Silly Plick!”

About the Genius Author

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in history, his sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or at Amazon.com or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

The Cat & Kindle.png

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