Nov 222013
 

Being Crowed in China

Is there such a ‘thing’ as being over crowed? Are there really enormously bulky Arnold Schwarzenegger type ‘Crows’ in China who tower over the population after being ‘over crowed?’ I don’t know, but I do know I’m frightened!



About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock’s brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called ‘The Trams of Prague’

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague – Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams



Don’t forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator’s heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes – what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the ‘i’s’?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it’s called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.

Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Nov 212013
 

Yes folks it’s that time of year! Those ignorant bastards at the Disney Vacation Club or disneyvacationclub@dvc-mail.com have started sending out their spam.

NewImage

I have lost count of the number of times I have told that drip Mickey Mouse that I don’t want to be in his f***ing Vacation Club, and I never actually joined the sodding thing in the first place, but even when I click the unsubscribe button and go to this page:-

http://unsub.go.com/beacon/suppression/suppression

Add me to the Disney Vacation Development, Inc. Do Not Email list

The request to remove ********@gmail.com has been recorded. Please allow up to 10 business days for your request to be processed.

Nothing happens, well ‘nothing’ except that I get yet more bloody spam from the ignorant idiots!

Even when you add their address to the completely useless Google spam filter nothing happens, just like spam from other big corporations I have to add, leading me to suspect that Google gets paid by these ignorant idiots to turn a blind eye when they are busy annoying us or to use the exact term ‘spamming’ us.

In England we have a saying that perfectly describes something that is just a little illegal, broken, or let’s face it CRAP and that is to call it “Mickey Mouse!”

The above all goes to should how ‘Mickey Mouse’ the Disney Vacation Club actually is!

NewImage



About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock’s brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called ‘The Trams of Prague’

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague – Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams



Don’t forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator’s heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes – what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the ‘i’s’?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it’s called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.

Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Sep 272013
 

Dover Castle is an enormous castle facing the English Channel and France in Kent and it has been described as the “Key to England” due to its defensive significance throughout history.

Dover Castle

The statement is a little odd really because all of the invasions which have taken place over the years have happened at other places making this extremely big “Key to England” rather pointless. But then it was built by the Kings of England who were all French at the time and renovated now and again by the most recent mob i.e. the German Kings and Queens of England which might throw some light on the thinking behind this defensive relic!

More recently following arms cuts and a general disbandment of the UK fighting forces the “Key to England” has taken on a bit of subterfuge as it defends England as noted on this door.

Neither coming nor going Dover Castle UK

Who says the British aren’t clever?

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Jul 182013
 

There’s a heat wave in the UK at the moment and that means that the British are having holidays at home and then turn up in droves at their local, and already over worked, Emergency Rooms with sunstroke and heat exposure rather than jetting off on holiday. Sadly the temperature in the UK is only around 30C and I wonder what would happen if the temperature got really hot?

Here is one British visitor attraction which I think I would avoid if I was on holiday in Britain and therefore stuck in a traffic jam while on my way to visit it!

That s not very convenient

That’s not very convenient is it?

Why would they want to make the disabled climb into the tops of trees to use the toilets? There are some sick people around aren’t there! Especially in Derbyshire, England it would seem.

Sad really because Derbyshire is such a nice place with wonderful countryside, here is a glorious example just for you dear cuddly readers.

Derbyshire Curbar Edge countryside

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Jun 042013
 

There has been a lot of coverage in the newspapers recently describing spelling as one of the most -important skills needed today and how all of the influences of text (and or what is called these days ‘internet’)speak and auto corrections in mobile apps is changing our spelling and grammar for the worse.

Obviously when working for the Brighton Argus a newspaper based in sunny Brighton, Sussex, England spelling isn’t really very important at all.

Spelling Is The Most Important Skill Needed When Working For The Brighton Argus

Although this is probably not the best place to mention my translator’s brother Roger who was a wonderful person and excellent brother I am going too anyway, because Roger was a journalist of some repute and hated poor grammar and terrible spelling. Nine years ago today Roger decided to prompt an obituary on the cover of the regional newspaper he was working for at the time.

So if you do drink do please raise a glass to Roger Woodcock because quite simply if he was here now he would knock a few back with you, ladies and gentlemen I give you the one and only RW.

Rog

We will never see his like again!

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

May 282013
 

In Devon, England, they believe in using humour to insult both sexes, which is not something you see everyday happily.

Sexist humour Devon

What a shame the publican had to resort to such humour, the pubs looks like a nice one in a nice village, but that sign would put me off ever going in there, even if I liked to drink, I hope that the same can be said for everyone – but who am I kidding? It won’t will it!

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

May 062013
 

Spelling problems

As you can see from this sign one of the priorities that has changed in the land of the Bard is the emphasis on spelling! Poor dumb England!

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Dec 032012
 

Someone sent me one of those ‘funny’ photographs. You know the ones which usually travel around the internet not making people laugh but making animals and more importantly Cats look a bit dim.

Sadly I have a feeling that this one is not only rather amusing it is also funny – darn it!

It’s a shame that the originator didn’t pay a little more attention to the design and use of typography but that probably is just my opinion and most humans who see this in their mail don’t think about things like that!

Having said that I though I would share it with you.

Catch a Cat



Don’t miss my Kickstarter Project

For a limited time only, as they say, you can help with what has been described as the best Kickstarter project ever, namely The Cat’s 3D Animated Movie Project.

Yes that’s right if you click here MY KICKSTARTER PROJECT you can help yourself to a piece of what will be movie history. I’m making a trailer for my up coming movie and I really need your help! Give as much as you like for wonderful and valuable rewards.

Sadly we live in a suspicious world so if you send this link to a friend you might like to use this one to show that there isn’t any funny business involved, there never is on my blog or site but then only you and I know that don’t we!

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1316679464/getting-out-animated-3d-short-film-trailer

They can paste it into their browser and go straight to my 3D animated movie project page on Kickstarter.



About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

Technorati Tags:
, , , , , , , , , ,

Nov 302012
 

DECLARED INTEREST

I have to say that I do know this lady from Rye, Sussex, but I stress I didn’t know there was a lane named after her!

I know here but I didn t knwo there was a lane named after her



Don’t miss my Kickstarter Project

For a limited time only, as they say, you can help with what has been described as the best Kickstarter project ever, namely The Cat’s 3D Animated Movie Project.

Yes that’s right if you click here MY KICKSTARTER PROJECT you can help yourself to a piece of what will be movie history. I’m making a trailer for my up coming movie and I really need your help! Give as much as you like for wonderful and valuable rewards.

Sadly we live in a suspicious world so if you send this link to a friend you might like to use this one to show that there isn’t any funny business involved, there never is on my blog or site but then only you and I know that don’t we!

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1316679464/getting-out-animated-3d-short-film-trailer

They can paste it into their browser and go straight to my 3D animated movie project page on Kickstarter.



About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

Technorati Tags:
, , , , , , , , , ,

Nov 152012
 

One of the least attractive features of the English countryside is the number of pointless road signs and indeed signs in general.

The single worst aspect of this fact is unfortunately as England has become, daily it would seem, a bigger and bigger ‘Nanny State’ local governments and literarily anyone who has spare cash to burn has erected a sign.

There is, as you can see from this one below, little point to the signs which usually state the obvious (or “bleeding obvious” as I heard the Vicar say).

Currently the valiant, but useless Don (Quixote) Cameron, Prime Minister of the UK has said that his government will do everything they can to stamp out useless signs and I expect there is a sign posted on a billboard somewhere saying just that!

You don t say



About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

Technorati Tags:
, , , , , , , , , ,