Aug 132014
 

Remarkable Weather Event New Zealand
Thank you the Nelson Mail. Who would have thought of that?


About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock’s brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called ‘The Trams of Prague’

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague – Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams


Don’t forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator’s heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes – what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the ‘i’s’?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it’s called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.

Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Apr 102014
 

Isn t New Zealand Fun

Ok, so it’s just a road sign, but look at it and consider the thought and hard work that went into drawing the skis.

First the sign is a million miles from civilisation (just like New Zealand some would say, though not me I hasten to add), someone stopped their car, got out, drew skis on a Kiwi (inspired by the way) and then got back in the car to drive lord knows how many miles home. And, by the way, had the presence of mind to have a black pen with them in the first place. Classic!

Speaking of Kiwi’s why do they look so much better with skis fitter? Beats me!


About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock’s brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called ‘The Trams of Prague’

This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.

If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague – Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams


Don’t forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator’s heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes – what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the ‘i’s’?

To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it’s called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.

Trams of Prague ePub Cover 2 1 13 225x225 75

Jun 202013
 

Something to chew on

Now I defy anyone to shout out “Ox Penis – oh my favourite, yummy!”

Happily I have been told that Ox Penis is not the national dish of New Zealand it just occasionally thrusts its way onto some menus!

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Jun 132013
 

In New Zealand they don’t want to waste your time with flowery tales of tourist attractions and other such fluff and nonsense, they give you down to earth information you can process immediately.

Straight talking New Zealand tourist information

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Apr 102013
 

For those of us who thought that New Zealanders were tame Aussies, who are are more polite, and have less of a beery laddish nature think again!

All in the best possible taste New Zealand

Just imagine a Funeral Director near you, (and if you live in Arrowtown, New Zealand you don’t have to imagine), who offers two really dreadful puns on his advertising billboards the strap line “for all those dead ends” and then the free phone number “0800 GAMEOVER” you can’t right and neither can I I want to be buried (in the very distant future) by people who think that dying is not the best thing to happen this month and are a bit (even if it is prevent) sad about the whole venture.

And worse did you see where this billboard is placed, yes on a Bowling Green and though I give the Arrowtown Funeral parlour full marks for addressing their almost immediate audience I also find advertising to them in this manner a little troubling don’t you?

About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store at last, yes it’s my wonderful first book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ so what are you waiting for you lovely Apple users?

Aug 142012
 

They say that church is a place for all and this church in New Zealand proves the rule even though the “fishy smell” must offer worshippers something of a challenge.

All welcome New Zealand

Obviously there is no room in heaven for the anti-social including Possums and quite rightly too!

So all this Cat can say is that he hopes that the Penguins grow up to be model citizens and the Possums mend their ways.

For those of you who are curious to know what the word “Whanau” means and are too lazy to look it up, or tired of getting adverts instead of results from your Google search, here is what I discovered, though I haven’t managed to find a New Zealander to check the translation with – just like trams there is never one around when you need one is there?

Whānau is a Māori language word for extended family. The letter ‘ā’ is obviously difficult to find even on an ecclesiastical word processor! Apparently a number of Māori words like Whānau are now becoming popular in New Zealand and entering the language unlike words from languages like… oh say Welsh!

I have a feeling that Whānau is not a word that is going to catch on globally like say a lot of black American words such as ‘hood’ (neighbourhood), ‘grill’ (some sort of mysterious device that sits on clenched teeth made from bling), ‘gangsta’ (armed children on street corners who emulate their elders) ‘bitch’ (a ‘hopefully’ beloved wife/girlfriend) and so on and so forth.

It does seem a shame that some words cross into the mainstream vocabulary and some don’t!


About the Author

The Cat Portrait2

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

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Feb 222011
 

I would just like to say that I am thinking about all of my friends and readers in New Zealand today and hope that more people are safe than first thought and that anyone trapped is rescued quickly.

NZ Earthquake

I see as of Tuesday 08.11 GMT the British government have done absolutely nothing and the Queen of England hasn’t offered any words of comfort to her New Zealand subjects, I wonder why?

Let’s hope that Australia is not the only nation to come to poor New Zealand’s aid hint hint.

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