It’s sad but true, journalism is not an exact science. If it was then most politicians, to say nothing of royal families, would be out of a job within hours! But journalism is full of ‘trade offs’ which keeps politicians and royal families firmly in their jobs, and it doesn’t stop there.
Journalism is as full of typos as any Chinese translation, and that is a fat – oops I meant fact!
Here is one of my favourite typos and I would like to sincerely thank all of the hard working dyslexic journalists at the New York Times (no less) for it, and then for a lot of wise cracking Twitter users who have adopted the fictional country in question.
Oh wait I think I should explain this perfect example of journalistic brain fade in more detail.
On Wednesday, January 7, a New York Times article about a rock climber who had been kidnapped in a Central Asian country carried this unfortunate typo, instead of Kyrgyzstan, the country was identified as the non-existent Kyrzbekistan.
Then inspired by the article and the entire nonsense of the moment hundreds, well a dozen or so, of Twitter users decided to become citizens of this non-existent country and inform others about their country’s customs, its exports and so much more and so they set up an “official” account for the country, @kyrzbekistan.
So what is Kyrzbekistan like? Here’s a sampling of what social media has been revealing about this intriguing new nation.
Kipchak’s, for those who don’t know are a medieval Turkic people who conquered large parts of the Eurasian steppe during the Turkic expansion of the 11th and 12th centuries, so you can imagine what a threat they pose to a peace loving country such as Kyrzbekistan can’t you!
Wow what a credit rating – just as good as Russia’s and very soon to be so much better of course! But then Kyrzbekistan is obviously a place of great tranquility and fiscal responsibility.
Yak curry tee hee – I tend to think that the Yak ‘knows’ what this correspondent is talking about, so no wonder he has a long face, though like horses Yaks are blessed or cursed with rather long faces anyway.
There is even a flag!
And for those who know anything about cities in the area surrounding this mythical country they might just recognise the names of the three largest cities in Kyrzbekistan.
1. Bishkent (capital)
I have it on good authority from a source in the know in the Kremlin, (who doesn’t want to be named, because not only is he a coward but he fancies a long life) that Pres. Putin, “is preparing plans to defend rights of the Russian speaking minority in the repressive country of Kyrzbekistan” just as tripartite talks between the President for life Atatürd the Third, the European Union and NATO are almost concluded and Kyrzbekistan will take its rightful place as a member of the European Community while it’s armed forces and famous Bicycle Brigade will become an integral part of NATO’s front and back line of defences.
Please don’t get the wrong impression of Kyrzbekistan by looking at our neighbours, may they forever rot in dark as the brilliance of our beloved Motherland bedazzles them, Kyrzbekistan is a country where there’s a lot of fun to be had, here’s a picture of our youngest competitor in last Friday’s forced laughing competition.
Happily I can tell you dear cuddle readers that Sarah the Camel’s family were saved from the dinner table when she won the competition despite intense completion from 53 year old Grandmother and ex forced laughing champion Nargiza.
Of course the fun doesn’t begin or end with forced laugher, quite the contrary, Saturday will see the return to KBC (the Kyrzbekistan Broadcasting Company) of the ever popular game show ‘Through the Window’ where contestants from our glorious second city of Tashkek will compete against the reigning champion Olga Bezprichiny for a place in the final to be held in Bishkent in two weeks time if the winner can have their head removed from the winning window in time!
About the Author
The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Catkind. His sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.
Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or from the internet at Amazon.com and here for the Travelogue The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”
I would like to tell you all about something new and rather nice that you can get from the Apple iBooks store, no not ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and his latest wonderful book you have been able to get that for ages, no something else rather wonderful. You can get John Woodcock’s brilliantly illustrated book the first in the series called ‘The Trams of Prague’
This heavily illustrated books created especially for iPads, Pods and Phones called Tram No 6 is the Naughtiest of Trams and it looks amazing.
If you would like to get this exceptional book the easy way, just click on this link:
Trams of Prague – Tram No6 is the Naughtiest of Trams
Don’t forget dear cuddly readers one and all that my translator’s heavily illustrated book has just been made available at the iBookstore or iTunes – what was it with Steve Jobs and all of the ‘i’s’?
To get whizzed straight to the store whatever it’s called just click on the picture of the cover of that wonderful book below.