Tag Archives: The Cat’s Travelogue

A Little Light Relief From My Book Launch

As the title says I thought I would offer a little light relief from my book launch, and I have some time before I have a chat with a nice lady from a media outlet in Seattle so here is a picture I saw the other day and thought to myself “which one are they visiting?”

Which one are they visiting

You humans really are ‘adorable’ and when I use that would I really me simple.

The book launch is going well, as I said above it’s busy but they don’t happen often and neither do colds what a shame that both came around at the same time for me this year!

Have you ordered your copy of my latest peerless masterpiece of feline? No! Well do because I don’t want to ask myself in a few weeks time “was it worth sneezing over so many members of the public at book signings and annoying sound engineers in TV studios?”

If you haven’t ordered your copy of my latest book The Cat’s Travelogue there is no better place than Amazon and you can do that using my handy link below although I have to say that my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com is as good but you can’t buy a toaster and my book there.

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Web Design Kittens

To my surprise and delight my web design Kittens have become rather popular among my dear cuddly readers and quite a few have added extra fan mail to the usual (and welcome fan mail) they send me by sending fan mail to my cute web design Kittens.

Quite a few of the fan letters asked for a picture of my web design Kittens and so so here it is.

Web Design Kittens

In answer to the person who wrote from Des Moines, the one from Bangalore and indeed the one from Didsbury, England the answer is a firm no.

Regarding the request from the man in Fife Scotland, you should be ashamed of yourself! How could my web design Kittens write a book? I ask you! That’s what I do! If you want a masterpiece of feline literature then read either Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary or The Cat’s Travelogue which you can get from either my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com or from Amazon.com.

To make it easier for you just click these pictures and you will be whisked straight to my wonderful book of your choice on Amazon – there who says I don’t look after my cuddly readers.

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Web Site Redesign

To accommodate my latest masterpiece ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ my web design Kittens have been working around the clock to redesign, improve and extend my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com.

So now when you arrive at my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com you have the choice of viewing my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com in either the original Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary mode or click the page turn icon at the top on the right hand side and enter… wait for it… The Cat’s Travelogue mode of my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com isn’t that neat? Aren’t my web design Kittens just the coolest web designers around? The answer there is yes by the way.

My clever web design Kittens have included the usual high quality features you expect from a truly www – wickedly wonderful website although of course we all know that there is only one www – wickedly wonderful website and that one is mine www.thecatsdiary.com and that is because it was me that invented the concept of www – wickedly wonderful website what a clever Cat I am! But then you know that don’t you my dear cuddle readers and my new friends.

So do go and visit my www – wickedly wonderful website and take a peek at the changes and if you like them do let me know through the usual channels or blind drop boxes.

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The Cat’s Travelogue

I thought that my dear cuddly readers might like a sneak peek at my latest blockbuster of a masterpiece – The Cat’s Travelogue which was published on Friday and is apparently selling like cakes straight from the oven already on Amazon.com, paper version here The Cat’s Travelogue Paperback Edition, so here is a short synopsis just for you.

Travelogue by John Woodcock

They say that terrible things happen to Cats in far off lands, they eat them in some uncivilised countries and I can now tell you that everything you hear is true, from what I have seen, the world is a bit of a mess and a nasty one at that and I know that’s true because I have recently seen a lot of it from some very unusual places.

Of course like most of the international incidents and indeed domestic emergencies I have caused in my travels I was oblivious to the dire situations I found myself in, but then I am only a Cat and what do I know?

This Travelogue is not a complete list of the places I visited because some have already paid me to “keep my big f’ing mouth shut” as most of their public relations bods put it, or they will have implemented banning orders preventing me from mentioning what awful dumps they really were!

In fact this book could be the first one in history that actually gets smaller over time and that’s because other countries I’ve visited may come up with what could only be described as a “very tempting” offer to have their chapters removed!

There what do you think of it so far? Racy, exciting, controversial, funny, brilliant, another masterpiece, written by a genius I bet you think all of those things and so much more judging by the reports of sales so far.

If you want to start reading my wonderful book immediately and it is a great read you can of course do that in ebook form from either Amazon.com The Cat’s Travelogue ebook or my own www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com which has been specially redesigned by my team of Web Design Kittens to incorporate my latest book The Cat’s Travelogue.

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What a Silly Feline!

Ok no prizes for guessing which Cat in his excitement to tell the world about Amazon.com launching his book early to coincide with the launch of their Kindle Fire managed to use the ‘old’ link to his other masterpiece ‘Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ – yes me of course.

Here is the right link.The Cat’s Travelogue on Amazon.com

There thank goodness I put that right. I am so sorry to send you all to the wrong place, but I have to say now you know how I felt when I was writing my Travelogue, everywhere I went was the ‘wrong’ place.

Here is a treat for you though, the cover of my latest book.

Travelogue by John Woodcock

And if you haven’t see the Kindle Fire in all of its blazing glory here is a link for that by way of an apology – again.

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A Sneak Peek Of The Cover Of My Latest Book

Yes that’s right dear cuddly readers here’s a sneak peek of the cover of my latest book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue.’

Now while I am very happy with the cover in general I am not too happy with one element, can anyone guess what it is? If you can there is a free ebook in it for you, if you can’t then after failing to change the cover at a last minute summit meeting with the publishers I added my comments about the bit of the cover I dislike to the new book so the week before last so you will be able to read the book and tell me what it is that I dislike.

The closing date for the competition has to be Sunday (tomorrow) sadly because my wonderful book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ will be available on Amazon.com by then and in bookstores soon afterwards but a little bird told me that you can buy the ebook version of my unputdownable book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ right now, in fact I think I am sitting on the link here. All of which means that if you buy an ebook now you stand a great chance of winning my amazing competition and still can buy a paper version at a later date.

Travelogue by John Woodcock

If you can’t live without my new book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ and I can’t blame you for that and want the ebook early then use this link, if you just want to cheat on the competition above then I understand just go for Kindle Edition of The Cat’s Travelogue on Amazon.com or Amazon UK.

There I am such a nice Cat not only letting you cheat in my competition but most importantly enabling you to have instant access to my wonderful ebook ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ in advance of everybody, yes that is the sort of Cat I am and just how much I love my cuddly readers and Cat fans.

Of course it might go without saying, but I am going to say it anyway, you can instantly get a copy of my latest book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ from my www-wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com or at the my store on my www – wickedly wonderful website.

There! Does this clever Cat think of everything or what? All you have to do today is to click on a few links, use your or someone else’s credit card and you are away and one of the very first to buy what people have described as the “travelogue to end all travelogues.”

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Personal Hairdressing In France

There are very few words to either explain or describe this photograph from a Paris suburb and frankly even this genius of a Cat who writes books and who writes blogs doesn’t have any of them! But all the same I thought you my dear cuddly readers would giggle at the ridiculousness of our french cousins.

Personal Hairdressing In France

I believe that ‘french cousins’ are the cousins in a family that no one talks about you know the ‘special’ ones for whom everything is a challenge.

Big news, my wonderful masterpiece of second book (electronic and paper) ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ will be in book stores, on Amazon.com waiting for you to buy it in your thousands this coming week I believe. I will let you have more information as soon as I can but stand by with your pocketbooks open.

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What Are The Penguins Up To?

You know that I have always thought that Penguins were not to be trusted and now I think I have found photographic proof from South Africa that proves my case!

What Are The Penguins Up To
Just ask yourself this; what are Penguins doing under vehicles? I bet they’re not practicing their skills as mechanics! And I don’t think that Penguins are under vehicles just because they are short enough to wander under them without bending. No there’s something happening in the Penguin world and I mean to get to the bottom of it, because as far as I am concerned the only animals that are allowed under vehicles are Cats if they are not moving and Hedgehogs if they are – poor things!

Lastly what are Penguins doing in South Africa? I thought that they liked colder climates – so they are now lurking under vehicles and being seen in warm countries, yes it is all beginning to add up isn’t it…


On another matter – well to be honest it’s the main reason for having a blog actually but of course us bloggers wouldn’t like our unsuspecting readers to know that we are only entertaining them so we can flog something – I need to remind all of you that it’s time to start thinking about buying my soon to be published second book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue.’

Now I know you are going to say that you didn’t expect a Cat to write one book and so two is something of a miracle but consider the miracle performed!

Yes that’s rights the world has seen a real miracle and my second book will be in the shops both real and webbed (as a real paper book or an ebook) very very soon, yes my masterpiece will be in the shops and on not only www.Amazon.com but also my www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com in time for Christmas which is just perfect.

I’m sure that I don’t have to do anything other than subliminally mention that my latest book makes just as good a Christmas present as my former one and how nice they will both look in the same gift wrapping do I?

Xmas Holly
Dear cuddly readers and potential book purchasers everywhere I do hope you enjoy what I hope is the first Christmas image you will see this year! May all of your Christmas shopping be without incident.

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Curried Child Anyone?

Ok the publication of my next blockbusting unputdownable book is getting closer as I mentioned yesterday sorry about that but one has to advertise – as President Clinton said if you don’t blow your own trumpet who will an intern? But I digress, here is a picture of a another culinary winner from China which judging by the writing is also a great hit in Japan and Korea “Curry of Mini Child.”

The world is as we know a strange place but it would seem the further east one goes the stranger it gets, you know like going to Brooklyn!

As you can see travelling the world and writing a Travelogue and eating all sorts of weird food was desperately hard, tiring and expensive work even for a good looking Cat and so if you don’t buy my wonderful Travelogue when it comes out I will be deeply distressed and feel very unloved – not to put too much pressure on you dear cuddly readers!

Curried Child

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It’s A Very Exciting Day Today!

It’s really a very exciting day today. I am with my designers in New York going over the final selection of cover designs for my soon to be published second book ‘The Cat’s Travelogue.’

You know I was pleasantly surprised, the cover designs are all really nice, except one that is which uses the most unflattering photograph of me, I do hope that we don’t use that design!

Unfortunately I have discovered that I have a little problem and that problem is that book publishing is (according to my publisher) a collaborative endeavour so we will be using the cover that is chosen by the majority. Mmh what do you think about that dear cuddly reader, you know what they say about things chosen by committees don’t you!

I have to say it came as something of a shock to discover that publishing my book was a “collaborative endeavour” because I would like to know where the designers, my agent Mr. Todd A Leibowitz call me “Todd” and my publisher were when I was knee deep in some of the less attractive countries around the world and just how close they were from swooping in and rescuing me when a mob of Pakistani religious fools were after my ‘Bacon’ just because they thought I was Danish? Not close at all is the answer.

Still I’ll forgive them their stupidity if we “sell as many of these ponies as we did the last Buckaroo!” To quote my Agent Mr. Todd A Leibowitz call me “Todd.” We apparently will be in “millionsville” once again. What can I say? I am so pleased and of course confused.

I am afraid when I listen to my agent Mr. Todd A Leibowitz call me “Todd,” publisher and the designers all talking excitedly at once I feel a little handicapped, not by the fact that they are speaking American, a language which is very close to English the language I first learned when I started to write my first ‘unputdownable’ book, the trouble is that when I hear them all talking at once, firing buzz words into the conversation as if they were machine gun bullets at a we hate Saddam/Americans rally in Iraq I just can’t keep up, and worse every so often they clap a hi five above my head and shout “YAY” when they agree on something all of which is beyond me.

I just hope that the last hi five and round of “YAYS” wasn’t something to do with the committee choosing the design for the book! I feel I should ask but they are just too busy congratulating themselves currently. Maybe there will be time later, although after lunch I am being whisked out to the airport and sent home, yes my agent Mr. Todd A Leibowitz call me “Todd” is paying for my stay which is probably why it’s so short.

Anyway as soon as I can I will post the ‘winning’ design on my blog and hope that all my fans let me know what they think of it. I think it’s really a good idea to let my lovely fans see the cover of my new book in advance of publication because then they will know what to grab off the book store’s shelves.

Of course ‘The Cat’s Travelogue’ will not only be available in your local bookstore it will also be available on Amazon.com as an ebook or a proper book and all of the other places you can possibly think of to get ebooks and the old style paper books.

The timing of publication is designed cleverly to catch the Christmas rush if the banks don’t bankrupt us all first! So please make sure that you buy at least two copies and one for your good self dear cuddly reader because they make excellent presents for everyone!

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