Tag Archives: www.blog.thecatsdiary.com

Catliens – They’re Here – Well They’re In The Cold Bit Of Russia

Ok so Russia is fabled for its high level of Vodka consumption but very sober air traffic controllers in the cold east of Russia recently claimed that they were ‘buzzed’ by a UFO travelling at 6000 mph – yes ‘6000 mph.’

And (it gets worse) when they spoke to the pilot she replied “with a female sounding alien voice in a language that was unintelligible but sounded Cat-like,” said one air traffic controller who probably needed at least a double Vodka or five to calm his nerves.

The Cat has decided to call out latest extra terrestrial visitors ‘Catliens’ and hopes that they are just a little more interesting and indeed ‘real’ than ET, who made one great movie but was never heard of ever again! Makes you wonder what Steven Spielberg did with the poor little guy doesn’t it?

The speed of the craft is almost as exceptional as the language of the pilot – what a shame I wasn’t there to translate, maybe I will be called into act as a consultant now that would be a nice little earner wouldn’t it – because it was travelling so fast. If you earthlings look here on Wikipedia you’ll see that the fastest manmade aircraft, the rather terrifying looking, Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird #61-7958 set the fastest time every by a man made jet on 28th July 1976 of 2,193.2 mph while being flown by Capt. Eldon W. Joersz and Maj. George T. Morgan.

Lockheed SR 71 Blackbird

The UFO was assigned a numerical code on the Russian radar of 00000 because the air traffic control system could not identify the aircraft and it can be seen clearly in the picture below flying straight towards the capital of the region Yakutsk. On the picture below I have circled the ‘object’ in red so that you can see it easily!

Radar Image of UFO

The air traffic controller told a passing Aeroflot pilot “I kept hearing some female voice, as if a woman was saying mioaw-mioaw all the time.” Unfortunately as you will hear on the video, which I have
posted on my www.wickedly wonderful website’s new video page my new Video page the air traffic controller’s contact with the Aeroflot pilot was disrupted by interference from the UFO as though it was jamming it – ‘da dah da’ sorry that is not a lot of russian ‘yes’s’ it is obviously a musical accompaniment to a significant fact!

Last night there was no comment from airport officials on the Catlien UFO contact, the video or indeed anything but then we were talking to Russians, which is odd because although the video has only recently come to light it was made some time ago (and surely they would have had time to get their story straight wouldn’t they?) because you can’t see any snow outside the control tower windows and currently Yakutsk is covered in the stuff with an air temperature of minus 30C and that is how it will be for eight months of the year.

Of course some experts, and frankly some people who are totally the opposite, claim that it is widely known that UFOs have made contact and landed on Earth but details have never been made public, is this the first time we, the more general public have made ‘contact?’ Actually that would be nice because ‘Contact’ was a great movie and little what’s her name who starred in it hasn’t really worked since, no let me correct that she hasn’t done anything as good since ‘Contact!’

Oh by the way I thought that I would mention that when I do chat to the other super intelligent Catlike beings I will put in a good word for most humans, but of course a Cat has to live (preferably in luxury) and if anyone feels like chipping in with the expenses then now, I strongly recommend, is ‘the’ time because you’ll go to the top of my list.

If you want to know the things I like you could do some research by reading my book Getting Out – Excerpts Cat’s Diary and you can get it here Amazon.com or you could read my www.wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com and of course it should go without saying that you must make sure that you get my next book which should be in the shops very soon it’s a brilliantly written ‘Travelogue.’

One thing I can assure you earthlings of is that, as yet, I haven’t travelled away from our planet, that is the planet that will belong to Catkind very soon of course it used to be called Earth though as yet we Cats haven’t actually agreed on a new name for our planet.

I can assure you it definitely won’t be called ‘Planet Fish’ as Dave the Cat suggested. He is more annoying than usual after eventually grasping the fact that the new overlords of the earth will be err… us and now keeps making buzzing noises and has stuck a wire coat hanger and two knitting needles into the top of his woolly hat and keeps repeating “I am an alien give me your fish earthling!” Then he throws his wonderful toy Space Rocket, which he got here from my friends at Mad Cat Toys, into the air and whistles like a Pig – or is it more like a Banker – I can never tell the difference.

If you want to do the same as Dave the Cat or just own one of these wonderful toy Space Rockets then do please click the little link that rather convenient says “Mad Cat Toys” on my blog and you will be whizzed there to choose your Space Rocket and more and I’ll get a very small ‘consideration’ for sending you there which is nice isn’t it?

Or if you can’t see the nice little logo of a Mad Cat then click here blog.thecatsdiary.com and you will be taken to my blog’s main page and “hey presto!” As magicians say when they are annoying Rabbits – you will see it!

If you want to see the whole Catlien experience do click here and watch the video on my www.wickedly wonderful website my new Video page where you can actually see that the UFO is travelling at a much faster speed than any of the aircraft nearby.

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New To My Blog

If you are new to my blog then you won’t know that I have added yet another feature to enable even more people to enjoy my thoughts, jokes, observations and ‘outings’ of idiots and ‘hopefully’ be entertained at the same time.

What is new to my blog is this rather handy feature called ‘Google Translate’ which rather badly translates my wonderful words into a language near you. And if you use that feature you’ll see that I have made it easier for people who don’t use English as their first language like err… me of course then you can read my wonderful blog in any language you choose – the Cat translation is non-existent I see!

Did you see what I did there? Something very clever and used the phrase ‘new to my blog’ in two very different ways, pure genius!

The Cats Google Tanslate

Limitations

‘Limitations’ is such a sad word but unfortunately we all have limitations and my limitation at the moment is that (hopefully for the moment) you can only translate my wonderful words of genius here at my blog on my own www.wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com and not at WordPress which is sad, so if you want to go straight to my blog and start translating now, here is the direct link – www.blog.thecatsdiary.com, if not then that is ok too.

So just to recap, for those hard of understanding, if you don’t read my blog here www.blog.thecatsdiary.com then you won’t be able to use the ‘amazing’ well you have to say that, although ‘rather good’ might be more accurate translation service from those gooey people who seem to own the internet.

In addition if can read this message then frankly I wouldn’t bother going to my blog here www.blog.thecatsdiary.com because you obviously don’t need the translation service, but if you read my blog and it doesn’t make sense (only because your first language is not English and not for any other reason) then do translate away here www.blog.thecatsdiary.com.

I would be delighted to hear what you think of my wonderful blog in your very own language if you for example call a Cat a ‘Neko’ and don’t use English all the time!

PS

As it is the last day of February I wondered if you could help me. I need about 50 of my loyal fans to buy my book at Amazon.com so that it breaks yet another record for books sold at Amazon.com this February.

Of course if you have already bought a copy of my wonderful book and one for all of your friends then it is time to start bullying people you hardly know to get a copy of my wonderful book ‘Getting Out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary” and do it now!

The Cat & Kindle

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