Yes that is right, all weekend I have been hot and not in my normally sexy way. I am boiling and fear that I have ‘Global Warming’ because I am hot everywhere.

What has happened to me I would like to know? Has someone de-forested bits of me that I can’t see? Am I in a carbon rich atmosphere? Will I get drowned in rising sea water?

Oh hang on a minute it is ok I have been sleeping in a patch of sunlight all weekend, I am surprised I’m not tanned.

Some people have accused me of being a hypercondriac and have told me that I should calm down I would like someone to tell me is being a hypercondriac dangerous? Can I get treatment for it or am I going to slip away noisily – well you wouldn’t want to slip away quietly would you if you are going to slip away at all!

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Bird Flu, Cats, Global Warming, Hypercondriac