Clever Elephants Better Watch Out!

I read today in a newspaper, yes I do that sometimes mainly on aeroplanes to look intelligent and to ensure the person next to me doesn’t talk too much, that Elephants’ legs work like wheels of 4x4s.

Now I am no expert, and I have to say that has never stopped me having an opinion like the everyone else from Prince Charles to… oh I don’t know some other busybody, but I think that these clever Elephants had better watch out or they could be in trouble.

First they will get taxed for resembling a 4×4 and secondly they will have the environmental lobby on their tails telling them that they are choking the planet.

Personally I quite like the idea of 4×4 Elephants although they would be a nightmare to park and would definitely make the school run even more arduous, but on the plus side they would be roomy and the probably gas mileage would be good, well when I say ‘good’ it would probably be around 6 mpg. But hey, at least a 4×4 Elephant won’t have any sticky gas pedal problems.

But and it is a big one unlike a Toyota Land Cruiser if your 4×4 Elephant sees a Mouse you had better hang on tight I think that the ride might get a little bumpy.


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2 thoughts on “Clever Elephants Better Watch Out!”

  1. Hi my names billy, and i have thinking for sometieme about purchasing an elephant, it has been a rough few weeks as my previous car is off the road, i used to own one of those zebra type R , but it has since started to reject the weight of the people trying to catch a ride. I myself am a talented idividual and far superior to the arverage man….well every man to be honest. With an elephant i plan to drive to more exotic locations, such as well,….. the moon. I think my elephant would have to be able to fly because well it wouldnt be any good otherwise and i need top quality afican imports. If you could either borrow permantly or even steal me an elephant id happily purchase it for a grand of around $20 or near offer.

    If you have any queries please contact me on my fourth telephone (the one for elephant purchases) …. the number is 000000000012 i know its hard to remeber. Also bear in mind id like a new model of elephant as the old ones seem to scream and lack in confidence when their backs cave in due to heavy load or gun fire.

    I would like to note before i go that if the elephant is sent to me with a full tank of petrol i will purchase it for a higher price.

    Thankyou for your help.
    Yours sincerly , Billy.

  2. Hello Billy.

    I am so sorry that I don’t sell Elephants, in fact yours was the first request I can recall, can I interest you in a Beetle, they are of course a lot smaller than an Elephant but that does have some benefits although they are discreet.

    I do hope that you do find an Elephant dealer maybe even import one from India, an Elephant and not a dealer of course, though I have heard that they have small ears, both Indian dealers and Indian Elephants.

    Good luck with your search and do please let me know how you get on I would like to hitch a ride to the Moon. I hope that your Thanksgiving Day is perfect though I know for the moment it will be Elephant free sadly.


    The Cat

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