Tag Archives: cuddly readers

Christmas Seems To Have Started

Xmas HollyIt’s odd Christmas seems to have started very early this year even before Thanksgiving and that surely is a record!

Still I can’t complain because my wonderful supportive and amazingly cuddly readers both old and new are buying my books in their thousands and apart from saying “please don’t stop,” I would like to thank them so very much for helping to keep a genius of a Cat warm this Christmas and indeed some way into the New Year.

Xmas HollyOf course I would stress that you, dear cuddly readers shouldn’t stop buying my books and that if you can you should buy even more because I have a little plan that I would like to share with you.

I plan to buy a Yacht! Well all sorts of successful people have Yachts and indeed a lot of people who are no longer very successful like poor old Stevie Spielberg who must be tearing his hair out wondering how to get a movie hit.

Here is a bit of advice for Steve – if you want a movie hit don’t what ever you do chose a story that is old and tired and written by a Belgian, oops sorry too late – isn’t the Tintin movie a bit of a Dog?

So what was I saying, oh yes I want to buy a Yacht, nothing too fancy just somewhere to entertain guests and special cuddly readers, sail the world and be very very comfortable – you do think I am worth it don’t you? Oops sorry for the l’OrĂ©al moment!

Xmas Holly

Oh I nearly forgot with all of the Xmas excitement here is a silly picture from somewhere where being daft is being normal – the human world -and in particular Kenya.

Ladies and Gentlemen and all cuddly readers I give you a ‘Kenyan Suggestion Box!’ Isn’t it just the best suggestion box in the world and definitely deals appropriately with all of the idiot suggestions that you get in boxes of this sort.

You Know Where You Can Put Your Suggestions  Keyna

Xmas HollyLastly if you haven’t got the copies of my books that you intend to give as cherished Christmas presents this year there is still plenty of time if you shop at www.amazon.com or indeed www.amazon.co.uk. Just to help you there are some more specific links below, but before those I would like to draw your attention to a book written and illustrated by my translator John Woodcock.

His book is called Trams of Prague Kindle edition and it has been enjoying a bit of success recently. Obviously the tome is not selling as well as Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary or indeed my latest and greatest (to date) book The Cat’s Travelogue but it’s nice to see that the old boy has got what it takes to ‘make it’ on his own without my help, don’t you think?

If he sells a lot of copies of his book Trams of Prague I think I’ll buy him a rowing boat so he can visit me on my Yacht! You dear cuddly readers can help and buy his book here Trams of Prague Kindle edition. I thought I would show you a picture of the cover he is really rather good at illustrating and that’s handy because Trams of Prague is what they call in the trade – heavily illustrated.

Trams of Prague Kindle edition

Xmas Holly

If you need to save time and get whizzed straight to www.amazon.com to buy one or better still multiple copies of my books I have, being a kind and generous Cat, made it so very simple that even a human can do it. Just click one or all of the links below.

Xmas Holly

Paperback edition of Getting Out at Amazon.com

Kindle edition of Getting Out at Amazon.com

Paperback edition of The Cat’s Travelogue at Amazon.com

Kindle edition of The Cat’s Travelogue at Amazon.com

Xmas Holly

Of course I could go on and add more specific links to the www.amazon.co.uk pages of my books but this blog page is getting a little cluttered with links don’t you think? And worse you might thing that I was just after your money, and I promise that simply isn’t true! As I said above I want a Yacht!

Xmas Holly

Finally (honestly), do you get the impression from this blog that I rather like Christmas time and in particular Holly? Well if you do you would be right I really do because it is a great time to buy my books, so what are you waiting for?

Web Design Kittens

To my surprise and delight my web design Kittens have become rather popular among my dear cuddly readers and quite a few have added extra fan mail to the usual (and welcome fan mail) they send me by sending fan mail to my cute web design Kittens.

Quite a few of the fan letters asked for a picture of my web design Kittens and so so here it is.

Web Design Kittens

In answer to the person who wrote from Des Moines, the one from Bangalore and indeed the one from Didsbury, England the answer is a firm no.

Regarding the request from the man in Fife Scotland, you should be ashamed of yourself! How could my web design Kittens write a book? I ask you! That’s what I do! If you want a masterpiece of feline literature then read either Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary or The Cat’s Travelogue which you can get from either my www – wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com or from Amazon.com.

To make it easier for you just click these pictures and you will be whisked straight to my wonderful book of your choice on Amazon – there who says I don’t look after my cuddly readers.

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A Special Request From Mr. John Woodcock

Hello to all of my cuddly readers. Today I have to fulfill a special request from my odd job man and occasional translator. The special request is to open up My Amazingly Readable Blog and www.wickedly wonderful website www.thecatsdiary.com for him to let you all know about a film that his daughter is in.

As Jo Woodcock is not only much better looking (not difficult I hear you say if you have seen the dreadful aforementioned Mr. Woodcock) she has more talent in her left paw – opps sorry foot – than Mr. W could ever pretend to possess or even after a herculean effort – muster.

Jo at Night

So because Jo Woodcock is going to be almost as famous as me your friendly neighbourhood genius and wonderfully talented Cat, I would like to present her latest movie (err… sorry… movie poster) the movie is called ‘Powder.’

Powder is a UK production and so will be out in the UK first on August 26th 2011 as you quaint humans call it. Actually its nice that a movie is premiering in the UK first for a change although it does mean that you nice folks over in the land where you spell ‘colour’ this way – ‘color’ will have to wait for the release or better still buy it as soon as you can on www.Amazon.com, thereby avoiding listening to people in the cinema eating popcorn, slurping Slurpees, and generally being annoying humans.

Actually I have had a really brilliant idea – the only question is why am I surprised?

If you haven’t ordered recently a copy of my wonderful book ‘Getting Out Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ you could order another copy at the same time when you visit www.Amazon.com. You can get a copy of my book here of course Amazon.com but then you probably know that by now don’t you.

Powder

If you’re interested you can read just a little bit more (and I mean that) here Powder the Movie or if you prefer to not to use links here – http://www.sodapictures.com/cinema/177. As a bit of an occasional gossip I can give you a choice snippet of information that you won’t find anywhere and that is that the ‘hunk’ on the poster is Jo’s co-star and in real life – boyfriend. He is the very talented Liam Boyle though of course I’ll leave you humans to decide upon his ‘hunkiness’ you all look the same to Cats and that isn’t helped by the fact that you all tend to be one colour or another and not piebald, skewbald, black and white, tortoise shell and other glorious Cat colours.

If you want to see more of Jo Woodcock and discover what other productions she has acted in, then the natural place to drop by would be jowoodcock.com and again if you don’t like links just type this into the old ‘puter http://jowoodcock.com.

So being a wonderful Cat and general ‘feline humanitarian’ if that isn’t too much for you to get your head around I have done my good turn for the day and made a crazed old translator very happy and rightly too he is a proud father, happily he is a proud father of someone who he can be proud of.

Mmh should I invent a new word for what I have done? Why not – I am a ‘felineitarian’ oh dear that doesn’t sound right does it? Unless of course we all practice saying ‘felineitarian’ every day for a month and then decided whether ‘felineitarian’ is a good enough word to qualify for an entry into the wonderful and ever trustworthy dictionary that is Collins Dictionary.

Obviously ‘felineitarian’ could easily make it into the Webster’s Dictionary or the ever dreadful ‘Encarta’ but then both of those dictionaries are crammed full of misspelt words that no respectable dictionary would ever consider including.

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Proof – That Austrians Love To Share

I have a feeling that the poor old Austrians and for that matter the Germans too have had a bit of a bad press these days being accused of being selfish and running the EU like it’s some sort of private playground but I am happy to tell you, my wonderfully cuddly readers, that I have discovered some evidence to the contrary.

Proof  That Austrians Love To Share

Ok so it’s a little overbearing to tell guests, even ‘dear’ ones that they must not eat their own lunch and, I presume, must share it with everyone present.

But although the sign is a little bossy it’s well intentioned, because as Bono the tax dodging bozo will tell you, if you allow him, there are millions of people all over the world going without, he just focuses on the more photogenic ones! So sharing is good.

About the Author

The Cat is one of the most successful feline authors in the history of Cat kind, his sharp elegant wit has produced the bestselling book ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ and of course the much plagiarised gag of the same name which appears on all of the funniest joke sites on the internet.

Copies of the Cat’s masterpiece of feline literature ‘Getting out – Excerpts from a Cat’s Diary’ can be purchased at a bookstore near you or at Amazon.com or at what The Cat calls his www – wickedly wonderful website here www.thecatsdiary.com where you can not only learn more about me the genius Cat but also play my games they are all paw picked by me and have been described as “exactly what free on-line games should be, fun, free and fantastic.”

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